I’ve never been one to hang up on a telemarketer.  It just seems like they are just trying to do their job and make a living where they can.  So, why be rude?  Instead, I’ll let them pitch their product and give me their best sales voice!  If its turns out that I honestly don’t want whatever they are selling, at least it wasn’t from their lack of attempt.  ;-)  

However, this company “Education Ambassadors” is wearing my patience and may be cause the first incident of my rudeness toward a telemarketer.  A while back I looked into a scholarship site.  And ever since, they’ve been calling me.  Referring me to schools that can help me.  Well, I’m not going back to school.  So, I asked them to stop calling.  Since, they’ve called back several times.  Each time, I politely ask them to “remove my number…”, “stop calling”, or something of the like.  Then I continue to let the representative give me their best sales voice.  Well, this morning was a sign that they have called too many times.  I’ve spoken to so many schools, that I am officially on the “do not call” list for all the schools that Education Ambassadors represents.  So, with yet another call this morning to introduce me to the “right school”, they ran into a brick wall and went so far as to ask me if I’d like to get a degree in a different subject!!  Or if I’d like to go for a Masters or PhD!  Wow!  Seriously….you’ve RUN OUT of schools to introduce me to?  Take a hint!  

I’m afraid that if they call again, I will actually have to be rude and threaten to sue their company for harassment.  I hope they don’t call again.  I’d hate to be rude.  

Hey! Its been a bit since I’ve blogged.  Sorry fans…er..um…fan.  

Anywho.  Life has been rough, true to the title of this blog.  But things going on in my life are not meant for public eyes.  So, my own personal journal has been getting all my attention these days.  I’ve actually been technologically distant these past days.  Which is odd.  For me.  I’m normally all about my computer.  No kidding, I’d sleep with it if it didn’t have sharp corners that could take my eyes out at night.  And the risk of it over-heating and burning me as I dreamt wasn’t an issue.  (My spell-check is telling me “dreamt” is not a word.  Is that true? When did that become so? So many issues.)

Well.  I do like taking a break from the cyber world every now and again though.  No blogs. No social networks. Nothing but real, breathing, blood pulsing, heart beating people.  Its nice.  

This is the first time we’ve owned a FRONT yard.  So, in decorating our house for Halloween, I realize, we have no fancy-shmancy “lawn ornaments” to put out.  Tragic.  This MUST be resolved. 

That is mos def the question.  I’m already agnostic.  I believe that there is a God.  I believe in the existence of good and evil.  But its hard to really jump in to the idea of the Christian God. And so, at the same time, I struggle with what to teach my son when it comes to religion.  Part of me has believed in God for so long, I would feel like a traitor to NOT teach him the prayers I learned as a child.  To NOT say grace before every meal.  To give our thanks to God when something good happens in our life.  Or to pray for his guidance when something bad happens.  

But there is so much of me that is constantly questioning what I “know”.  For instance, where is the mention of dinosaurs in the bible.  (Oops…should “bible” be capitalized?)  Dinosaurs were real.  They were here.  We have found their bones throughout the world.  So, why didn’t he mention those?  Or did he?  And why did he rid of dinosaurs but not man?  And WHY have we evolved?  Because we clearly have.  Why do we as humans continue to thrive and prosper if we were not meant to in the first place?  Why give us all this knowledge, let us long for it, grow because of it, and then punish us with “the ending of the world”?  

I was recently told that God doesn’t want us to cross ourselves or even bow before a cross because that is a form of ideology.  And the last thing he wants to be reminded of is his death.  But doesn’t he also want us to remember why he died?  

I’m told that I’ll probably be going to Hell because I have been made “aware” of the “true christian” religion and I refuse to follow it.  I’m committing blasphemy.  Which only drives me further into disbelief.  Why?  Why would a God who molded me, created me, gave me life….a God who I worshiped genuinely and whole heartily, condemn me to Hell because I chose to love and make the most of the time I was given here on Earth?  Why would he allow me to care, love, teach my son if he had planned on ending life here on Earth anyways?  I just can’t believe that an ALL KNOWING God would not have thought this through.  He would allow the children to continue entering this world even though they would not live their life fully because the end of this world is nearing.  The fact that he would allow ANY child to go through pain to be with him.  How cruel is that?!  

Anyways.  There is so much regarding religion that I don’t agree with.  What if the Romans and Greeks had it right?  There isn’t just ONE God.  There are several.  Each with their own responsibilities.  Or maybe the Indians with the God with several arms.  I don’t know her/his name.  Or the Chinese with Buddha.  So many many questions.